Monday, April 28, 2025

Stevens

 Stevens died in hospice yesterday morning.

I'd been anticipating The Call.  At 4 a.m. there was a gurgling sound that seemed to come from his bathroom.  I snoozed a while longer, got up, and made coffee.  I was reading the newspaper when my phone rang at 6:45.  That was the hospice nurse with the news.  I went to the hospital right away and sat in the room with him.  The nurse came in to do paperwork and said she'd write the time of death as 6:40.  I asked if it might have been earlier and she said yes, they discovered the death on their rounds.   I think the 4 a.m. gurgle was a last sign.   

Saturday morning I took a walk at the state park.  


There was no one to guard the parking lot while I was on the trail.  


Saturday afternoon our friends Debbie and Bill brought their therapy dogs Buddy, Shadow, and Shiloh to the hospital.  Their fellow therapy dogs (and owners) Beau and Mollie came, too.  

Stevens was not conscious for the visit but I certainly appreciated it.  



I took this photo last Monday (a week ago!) at the nursing home when he was somewhat alert.  "What does your shirt say?" I asked.  "Bowdoin College."  "Where is that?"  "Brunswick, Maine."

Those were the next-to-last words he spoke. In hospice I said "I love you" right into his ear. He opened his eye a bit and sort of rasped "I love you," then went back to sleep.


I am okay.  You probably have experienced the flurry of activity that occurs with a death of a loved one.    I  will write more later.   

32 comments:

  1. Sending my heartfelt condolences to you and yours...take care hugs, Julierose

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  2. I am so very sorry Nann. Of course I didn't know Stevens but I did enjoy seeing his wonderful smile when you shared his picture.

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  3. I'm so sorry, Nann. The empty seat in your car was the most poignant reminder of your loss to me. Stevens was always smiling from that seat as you shared your amazing places to walk. I always loved when you would post, "We're going on an adventure!" Thinking of you.

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  4. L.I.P.E.O. and all my thoughts with you.

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  5. Even though anticipated, it’s still hard. Lean in to God. Thinking of you.

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  6. My heart goes out to you . Hugs and remember to take a breath or two yourself ;)

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  7. What beautiful last words to give Stevens and to hear back from him. Please know so many are thinking of you in this difficult time.

    Ceci

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  8. So sorry Nann for your loss. Its hard even when we know its coming. Wee prayers for you

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  9. I'm so sorry, Nann. My deepest condolences to you and yours. You are in my thoughts. (((Hugs)))

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  10. I'm so sorry, Nann. I hope you have a circle of supportive friends around you during this time of sorrow. I will miss seeing your posts with Stevens's delightful smile.

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  11. Hugs, Nana. May you be comforted with all of the memories of Stevens during this difficult time. Take time to grieve. We will be here for you.

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  12. Our condolences Nann. Even when expected the reality is difficult at best.

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  13. Asking the Lord God Almighty to comfort you and Steven's loved ones as only He can. Praying for shalom shalom peace for you in your mourning, and as you live forward.
    “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.”
    ‭‭Psalms‬ ‭147‬:‭3‬ ‭NIV‬‬

    Laura Haynes

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  14. So sorry to read your sad news today. Big hugs for you.

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  15. Hugs dear Nann. Thinking and praying for you and your family.

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  16. Sending virtual hugs and my deepest sympathy. When my mom died of Alzheimer's/dementia, someone told me to always remember that grief is some of the hardest work you'll ever do. Please be gentle with yourself as you deal with all that is ahead of you.

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  17. So sorry for your loss. Sending hugs, prayers and the hope that you are coping ok.

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  18. I am so sorry for your loss, Nann. My condolences to you and your family. It seems you have a number of friends and I hope they are there to support you during this time. I am glad you are doing “OK”. May peace be with you.

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  19. My condolences and sending hugs!

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  20. I'm so sorry for your loss. Wishing you strength and peace at this difficult time.

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  21. It's so hard when a loved one dies. My mom passed the week before Christmas. She was put on hospice at the nursing home. My daughter passed away almost 2 years ago. She was in the Hospice House 2 weeks before passing.

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  22. I'm so sorry, Nann. I know your many friends will be there to console and comfort you.
    Pat

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  23. I’m so sorry Nann. I’ve read your blog for many years & have always been amazed how you balanced a healthy life for yourself while taking such tender attentive care for Stevens. Thank you for all you share in your blog. Beth in AL

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  24. Even expected transitions can be difficult. I'm sorry for your loss. I agree with you that the 4 am sound you heard was related to his passing. Andrea in MO

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  25. May Stevens rest in peace and you rest in the wonderful memory of him. We were in Brunswick on Sunday...a lovely town. No need to reply.

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  26. Oh Nann, I am so sorry. I always enjoyed reading an about how you took care of him and the good life you made for both you and your husband. I think we all learned so much from you about true love. He is in a better place. Much love to you during this difficult time.

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  27. Oh Nann, I’m so sorry to hear of Stevens’ passing. My heart goes out to you. May he rest in peace, and may you be comforted by the love of your friends and community. xoxo

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  28. Nann, from what I know about you through your blogposts, I wish I can be as good a wife to Paul as you were to Stevens. Lots of Love and Big Squishy Hugs.

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